How Do I Stop Thinking Before Bed? | Ep. 513

In this episode, I talk about what to do when your head hits the pillow but your brain suddenly seems to get louder. So many people ask me how to stop thinking before bed, but the truth is, we can’t stop ourselves from having thoughts. Instead, I explain how labeling certain thoughts as “good” or “bad” can actually make them feel more threatening and give them more power. The goal is to learn how to notice a thought without judging it, solving it, or getting pulled into rumination.

I also share why this is a skill we need to practice during the day, not just when we’re lying awake at night. When an uncomfortable thought appears, we can practice noticing it, allowing the uncertainty to remain, and gently bringing our attention back to something in the present moment. The more we practice this attention control throughout the day, the better prepared we are when our minds get quiet enough at bedtime for those thoughts to feel especially loud.

Finally, I talk about the pressure we put on ourselves to fall asleep and how worrying about whether we’ll sleep can create even more anxiety. Rather than trying to force sleep or solve tomorrow’s problems at bedtime, we can give our attention to something neutral or enjoyable and allow our bodies time to wind down. The goal isn’t to stop thinking. It’s to become more skilled at responding to our thoughts in a way that doesn’t keep feeding anxiety.