Podcast/Blog

17 August 2018

The Anxiety of Decision Making Is REAL and EXHAUSTING!

When making decisions, we might be faced with anxiety about making the “right” decision.  We might also be faced with the anxiety of making the decision that won’t hurt others or impact others negatively.  We might also be faced with anxiety that our decision will cause us to miss out on something better or more beneficial to our long term goals.  This constitutes the anxiety of decision making.
Basically, making decisions is the ULTIMATE exposure to uncertainty and tolerating discomfort.  There is no way to make a decision without acknowledging and facing uncertainty.  Here is a teaser from the episode.  Even when you put the decision making aside, you are actually making a decision.  Not making a decision is technically making a decision you didn’t even know existed.

This weeks podcast is all about The Anxiety of Decision Making.  We go over some of the themes that come up surrounding decision making such as Hyper-responsibility, Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) and Perfectionism.

We also talk about how we must embrace uncertainty in our lives and accept that life doesn’t need to be perfect.  This can be easier said than done, so we discuss some important mindfulness tools which can help us manage perfectionism, hyper-responsibility and Fear Of Missing Out (FOMO) when it comes to decision making.

We hope you enjoy this week’s podcast episode or Your Anxiety Toolkit.

Also guys, we are excited to share that ERP SCHOOL is going to be released VERY soon, so keep your eyes out.

CBT School is also excited to share that our lovely friend Stuart Ralph is offering The OCD Summit, an online summit specifically for OCD therapists.  The OCD Summit will be a 6-week webinar series where Stuart Ralph, host of The OCD Stories podcast, will interview some incredible scientists and clinicians in the OCD field, with you the therapist as the audience.   Kimberley is honored to be selected to be one of the panelists for this exciting event.  Registration will include 6 topics curated for your continued development as an OCD therapist, where you can ask questions and network with other therapists in the private FB group community.  Click here to join.

10 August 2018

“Trust your capacity to change” – Tara Brach Interview

3 August 2018

My IOCDF Conference Key Takeaways

One of the biggest honors I have as a therapist who treats anxiety disorders is to present at the International OCD Foundation (IOCDF) annual conference.  I just adore these conferences, mostly because they provide a mix of both treatment presentations and support groups for those who struggle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and for therapist who provide evidence based treatment for those who have OCD.   Another amazing thing about these conferences is that they also provide support groups and presentations on Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors (BFRB’s) such as Trichotillomania (Hail Pulling) and Excoriation Disorder (Skin Picking) and Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) and also co-occuring Eating Disorders and Substance Abuse.

27 July 2018

“You are right where you need to be” with Cami Julaine

Well folks! Welcome back to another episode of Your Anxiety Toolkit.  Today, we have another amazing guest interview as a part of our “We can do hard things” series.    I am so excited to share with you an amazing interview with Cami Julaine, an avid mental health advocate, blogger, singer, actor and all-around wonderful person.    In this week’s episode, Cami shares her journey through Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, an Eating Disorder, Trichotillomania, Panic Attacks and Trauma.

One of the things I love the most about Cami is that she is so authentic and open.  I know we all struggle with finding the motivation to keep moving forward sometimes, as managing Anxiety Disorders such as Panic Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Social Anxiety, Phobias, Health Anxiety can be very difficult.  Cami shares with us a inspiring story of how she went from rock bottom to taking bold steps towards her recovery.  Cami shares her story of being supported by family members and close friends (ahem, Paula Abdul) who urged her to get help.

This is an incredibly interesting and informative interview, as Cami shares how she had to blend many types of tools (and therapy) to get her to where she is today.   Cami shares some wonderful mindfulness tools to help manage Panic Disorder and Panic Attacks.  You will really love these tools, as they are very similar to ones we have discussed in previous episodes of Your Anxiety Toolkit, with a little Cami Juliane-twist. 🙂   Cami also talks about her experience with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP).

Finally, Cami shares with us how she has integrated spirituality with her recovery and how she practices self-care and self-compassion as a part of that practice.  This is a topic that I have’t touched upon much at all and I am sure you will find it inspirational and validating.

You can find Cami Julaine on Instagram @camijulaine and more information on her website here.

One thing before we say goodbye.  GET READY…because ERP School (our online course for Exposure & Response Prevention for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and other Anxiety Disorders) is COMING SOON, so stay tuned.  Sign up HERE to be on the waitlist and be alerted as soon as it is available.   PS: The first 20 people to sign up get a free, exclusive “We Can Do Hard Things Meditation” that you can download and use as often as you like.  YES!

20 July 2018

You Can Be Anxious AND Have Courage!

Courage.  Where do we find it? How do we get it? And, once we get it, how do we keep it?

In this era, being courageous or brave comes with great expectations.   Men are expected to show their “brave face” ALL the time, or they run the risk of being called a “sissy.”   That is a lot of pressure!  Women (and many times men too) are expected to multi-task multiple difficult things at once, but also must look pretty and be smiling while doing it.

But, to top it all off, we humans (men, women and children) with anxiety are often expected to meet all of the above criteria AND keep our anxiety to ourselves.  Where did we get this from?! I cannot tell you how many times I have heard stories about family members or partners or parents who have told someone struggling with anxiety or depression (or another mental health struggle) to “be braver” or “toughen up” or “you gotta be stronger through this.”  While I do understand what they are trying to convey, today’s podcast episode is all about approaching courage and bravery with a new (more reasonable) perspective.

You see, I like to think of bravery and courage as something you can experience WITH anxiety.  I actually think they go beautifully together.  We can feel dreadful fear AND be courageous.  We can feel overwhelming sadness AND be strong.   What we have been told about bravery and courage is all off.  It limits us and makes us feel like we must not try things until we have no fear and we can “hold it together.”

I like to believe that the person who decided to go to the party, despite their tremendous social anxiety, is the brave one.   I believe that the person who does that really hard thing (even if it happens to be easy for other people) is the courageous one.   I believe the one who has a tear running down their face as they face their fear is a brave rock star!

I hope you enjoy this podcast episode and begin to challenge your view of what bravery and courage looks like.  As always, thank you for supporting me with this podcast and with CBT School’s online courses.

Enjoy!

13 July 2018

Value-Based Living

Hello there CBT School Family

Welcome to another episode of Your Anxiety Toolkit Podcast.

As you may know, each week I do my best to bring you a new tool or idea for you to put in your toolkit, in hope that it will give you some skills to manage anxiety, panic and other difficult thoughts, feelings and sensations.

I always envision that I am slowly handing you one tool after another and that you are carefully packing those tools into your toolkit or tool belt, so that you feel ready to face your day, with or without anxiety.

This week, I want to discuss with you your metaphorical toolkit; the box or belt in which you hold dear to your heart and use daily to help you live your best life.   The most important thing to understand in today’s podcast is that carrying a tool belt/toolbox/toolkit is a choice.  Every week, you freely join me for a weekly discussion about recovery and living a great life, while having anxiety.   You don’t have to carry your toolkit and all the tools around.  Many choose not to carry a tool belt or any tools.  But you, you do.  It’s pretty cool if you ask me.

You see, the tools your put in your toolkit are your mindfulness skills.   Your toolkit, the place you hold these tools, is your values.  If you are on a mission to be a better human, you obviously value your wellbeing.  It is a value that you stand by.  You value your recovery.  You value your quality of life.  Using these tools of yours contributes to value-based living.

Values are very important to our recovery.  The only problem is, that sometimes fear can come in and stomp all over our values.  Sometimes fear can lead us away from our values and away from our toolkit.  Sometimes fear can lead us towards other problematic behaviors, such as compulsions including checking, counting, avoidance, reassurance seeking and mental rumination.  Fear can also lead us towards anger and saying mean things to ourselves.

Today, we talk about identifying our values and ways to use the tools you have to help you lead with values.  We use concepts from Acceptance & Commitment Therapy, also knows as ACT.  ACT is a very helpful treatment modality that beautifully compliments Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Exposure & Response Prevention (ERP).

I hope you find it helpful!

Forward we go,

Kimberley

6 July 2018

Surfing the Worry Imp’s Wave

In this week’s episode of Your Anxiety Toolkit, I had the pleasure of talking to Sharon Selby, Marriage and Family Therapist and Author.  Sharon has written an amazing children’s book called Surfing the Worry Imp’s Wave and this book is simply amazing.

Before you turn away thinking, “This doesn’t apply to me.  This is about kids stuff!”, wait up!  Since reading Surfing the Worry Imp’s Wave, I have been using these techniques with some of my adult clients and they LOVE them too.   This episode brings some helpful tools and tricks to manage anxiety and perfectionism (at any age). Surfing the Worry Imp’s Wave is a science-based book using the same mindfulness tools and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) tools I use with some of my clients and members of the CBT School Campus with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), Panic Disorder, Health Anxiety, Social Anxiety and Phobias.

During the episode, Sharon discusses her inspiration behind the book, her work with young children who have anxiety and what tools she has found to be super helpful.  As I mentioned about, I have found that these tools are helpful for us BIG kids too (adults).   Sharon also tells us about some of the games involved in the books and some helpful tools to manage fear, perfectionism, separation anxiety, and panic.

You guys know how much I LOVE a good story or metaphor, and there are plenty in this book.  Here is one I want you to think about.  In the book, Sharon talks about how our brains need to make mistakes to grow.  If we make a mistake, it is like water on a plant.  Mistakes help our brains grow into smarter and kinder people.  I just adore this part of the book and it is something I have implemented with my young (and old) clients (and me too!).   When I make as mistake, I now close my eyes and imagine my brain neurons growing and thriving. This is just one of the wonderful tools that Sharon talks about.

I cannot wait for you to listen to this week’s podcast, and read this book.  Surfing the Worry Imp’s Wave is a bookshelf must have, if you have kids with anxiety. But don’t forget,  THIS big kid loves it too!!!

See the link below to get your hands on Surfing the Worry Imp’s Wave:

https://www.sharonselby.com/product/surfing-worry-imps-wave-reducing-childrens-anxiety

Sharon Selby’s free e-book 8 Common Mistakes to Avoid When Your Child Is Anxious is available at: sharonselby.com/free-ebook

You can also hear more about Sharon on her Website HERE

29 June 2018

 Thought Suppression Doesn’t Work!!

22 June 2018

Anxiety-Related Exhaustion is NO JOKE!

One of the most common struggles I hear from my clients and the members of the CBT School Campus is how EXHAUSTING anxiety and depression can be.   If you are barraged daily by exhaustion resulting from Anxiety (or any other mental health issue), you are NOT ALONE!  Experiencing Anxiety is a full-time job.  No one can argue with that.    Anxiety can drain us of our physical energy, our emotional energy and can cause us to have nothing left to give at the end of the day. It can make us too tired to be social and make us want to sleep the day away.   Anxiety-Related Exhaustion can make us feel alone and like there is no hope for us.

If this is you, this is the episode for you. Because you know what?!  There IS hope for US!

In this podcast, we talk about some mindfulness tools to manage anxiety-related exhaustion.  We talk about learning to observe your thoughts and correct them to thoughts that are more helpful and less draining.

We also address a few very important mindset shifts you may need to make.  You see, when we are overwhelmed with tiredness and anxiety-related exhaustion, we often will begin to feel hopeless and start to believe that there is no end in sight.  Everyone tells us, “Just keep going”, but we can sometimes feel like we barely have the energy or faith that we need to “just keep going”.   In this episode, we talk about specific mindset tools that I use with my clients who struggle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Anxiety, Depression and Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors (BFRB’s).

And last of all, I use one of my favorite metaphors for managing Anxiety-Related Exhaustion.  You guys know me! I love to use silly metaphors.  That being said, I really believe in it and it works.  I promise you that it will make you take better care of yourself if you put it in place and prioritize it.

Please don’t hesitate to let me know what you think and if this is helpful.

Also, if you listen on iTunes, please do leave a review.  Good reviews help me reach more people and help me get the really important (and inspirational) people on the show.

Forward we go,

Kimberley

15 June 2018

How Advocacy “Keeps Me Well”: Interview with Ethan Smith OCD Advocate

Do you ever wish you had someone to inspire you and give you hope about your recovery?  Maybe you wish there was a story about OCD or anxiety or mental health that looks similar to yours and you wish you knew how the story turns out? Well, today I give you Ethan Smith OCD Advocate.

Ethan Smith (OCD Advocate) was the keynote speaker at the 2014 Annual International Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (IOCDF.org) Conference, the International OCD Foundation National Ambassador, a writer, director, producer and OCD Advocate.

Amongst these incredible talents and accolades, Ethan is hilarious and kind and VERY informed about the ins and outs of OCD and the treatment of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).  During this interview, Ethan talks about his struggles to find correct therapy, his experience with finding evidence-based treatment such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT).

Ethan also opens up about his draw towards advocacy work, stating that advocacy “keeps him well” and how being honest and open is considered advocacy work.  I think we often feel that we have to write a book or start a campaign or a fundraiser to be mental health advocates, but Ethan shares his belief that we ultimately just have to share our story and use our story to help others not feel alone.

One of the things I love the most about Ethan is his ability to express compassion and humor in the same sentence.  Discussions around Mental Health can feel very heavy, and Ethan has a way of making light of a very heavy topic.

Thank you, Ethan, for all that you do.

If you feel like sharing your mental health struggles with others is too big of a step right now, consider joining our Facebook Group, CBT School Campus.  This group is filled with brave, supportive and compassionate people and was created so you could feel support and connected to others who are working tirelessly on their mental health in a safe and supportive platform.   Click here to be taken to the FB group.

Click here for Ethan’s Keynote Speaker Video

DO YOU WANT TO REALLY IMPROVE ON YOUR MINDFULNESS SKILLS FOR OCD?  CHECK OUT CBT SCHOOL’S ONLINE COURSE, MINDFULNESS FOR OCD.