Mindfulness vs. Distraction: Which is Better for Anxiety & Panic? (A Therapist Explains) | Ep. 473
In this episode, I break down the difference between mindfulness and distraction for anxiety so you can stop second-guessing yourself and start responding in ways that actually support long-term recovery.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
- How the anxiety cycle keeps you stuck, and exactly where to intervene
- The key differences between mindfulness and distraction (and why intention matters)
- How to decide what to use based on anxiety intensity and time available
- Why distraction isn’t “bad,” but must be used strategically
- How these skills apply differently to OCD, panic disorder, generalized anxiety, eating disorders, and depression
- Why recovery is a B-minus process, and how self-compassion helps you choose wisely in the moment
Mindfulness or Distraction for Anxiety?
Content
How to Know What to Use, and When
Have you ever noticed this?
Anxiety hits.
Your heart races. Your thoughts spiral.
And then, on top of the anxiety, you feel confused.
“Should I be mindful?”
“Should I distract myself?”
“What’s the right thing to do?”
Now you’re anxious… about how to handle your anxiety.
I see this all the time. And today, I want to untangle this confusion for you. Because the question isn’t mindfulness versus distraction. The real question is:
When does each one serve your long-term recovery?
Let’s break it down.
First: Understand the Anxiety Cycle
No matter what form of anxiety you struggle with, OCD, panic disorder, social anxiety, health anxiety, generalized anxiety, the cycle is similar:
- Trigger (internal or external)
- Anxiety spike
- Fight, flight, freeze, or fawn
- Avoidance, rumination, compulsions, or safety behaviors
- Short-term relief
- Long-term reinforcement of fear
The problem isn’t anxiety.
The problem is the automatic urge to get rid of it immediately.
That short-term relief feels good, but it strengthens the long-term trap.
So our work in recovery is learning how to intervene at that moment when anxiety hits.
And this is where mindfulness and distraction enter the conversation.
What Is Mindfulness (Really)?
Let’s get crystal clear.
Mindfulness is:
- Observing thoughts, feelings, sensations, urges, and images
- Without judgment
- Without trying to suppress them
- Without rushing to get rid of them
It means allowing anxiety to be present.
Not liking it.
Not wanting it.
But allowing it.
Mindfulness is a long-term strategy. It rewires your response to fear. The more you practice it, the less your brain defaults to panic and avoidance.
It builds mastery.
It builds regulation.
It builds flexibility.
But it takes reps.
Lots of reps.
What Is Distraction?
Distraction is when you deliberately shift your attention away from anxiety.
It can:
- Provide temporary relief
- Give you a pause
- Help you regulate enough to think clearly
But here’s the risk:
If overused, distraction becomes avoidance.
And avoidance keeps anxiety alive.
So the real question becomes:
What is your intention?
Are you distracting so you never have to face the fear?
Or are you using it strategically to help you do the scary thing anyway?
That distinction changes everything.
The Two Factors That Matter Most: Intensity & Time
When deciding what to use, I want you to imagine a simple graph.
On one axis:
Anxiety intensity (0–10).
On the other axis:
Time available.
These two variables help guide your choice.
High Anxiety (9–10/10) + Plenty of Time
Ideally: Mindfulness first.
But let’s be real.
Sometimes you are so overwhelmed you can’t access your skills. Your brain is offline.
In that case, you can use brief distraction to regulate,
then return to mindfulness.
Think of it as a stepping stone.
Not an escape hatch.
High Anxiety + No Time
You have to get on the plane.
Step into the elevator.
Walk onto the stage.
There’s no pause button.
In this case?
Use whatever helps you move forward.
Sometimes that means staring at one point on the plane and getting yourself down the aisle.
That’s okay.
You’re still doing the exposure.
You’re still moving toward your values.
The distraction is in service of courage, not avoidance.
Low Anxiety + No Time
This is prime mindfulness territory.
When anxiety is lower, you have better access to your prefrontal cortex. Your skills are available.
Use these moments to build reps.
This is training.
Low Anxiety + Plenty of Time
This is gold.
Practice mindfulness here.
Mindfulness isn’t something you use only in crisis. It’s a daily practice. The more you practice outside anxiety spikes, the stronger you are during them.
When You Have OCD: Be Careful With Distraction
With OCD, distraction can easily become thought suppression.
And suppression backfires.
If I tell you not to think about an elephant…
You will think about an elephant.
Trying to push intrusive thoughts away strengthens them.
For OCD recovery, mindfulness, allowing the thought without engaging, is almost always the more powerful approach.
Use distraction sparingly and intentionally.
Panic Disorder: The Fear of Fear
Panic disorder is often a fear of panic itself.
If you distract every time panic rises, you may reinforce the belief:
“I cannot handle this.”
Yes, at a 10/10 panic spike you may need brief grounding or distraction to stabilize.
But the long-term work is allowing panic sensations without fleeing from them.
Mindfulness teaches your nervous system:
“This is uncomfortable, but not dangerous.”
Generalized Anxiety: Practice Daily
With generalized anxiety, money, relationships, work, mindless scrolling becomes sneaky avoidance.
The more you bring mindful awareness into daily life, the more regulated you become overall.
Practice when calm.
Not just when triggered.
Eating Disorders: Nuance Matters
During exposure meals, I’ll be honest, there were times I used distraction.
Was it ideal?
Maybe not.
But it helped me complete the exposure.
And that mattered.
The question isn’t perfection.
The question is:
Is this behavior moving me toward recovery?
If yes, we can work with that.
Depression: Strategic Occupation
With depression, rumination can be relentless.
In severe depressive episodes, we sometimes use what DBT calls “occupation.”
This means intentionally engaging in an activity to shift attention away from depressive rumination.
Not to avoid reality.
But to prevent being swallowed by the depressive narrative.
Again, intention matters.
Think of Distraction as a Life Vest
You don’t wear a life vest all day.
You use it in emergencies.
Distraction is a life vest.
Helpful in crisis.
Not a long-term lifestyle.
The Real Trap: Trying to Do It Perfectly
If you found this topic because you’re worried about “doing recovery right,” I want you to hear this clearly:
Recovery is not an A+ process.
It’s a B-minus process.
You will wobble.
You will use distraction when you meant to be mindful.
You will miss opportunities.
That is not failure.
That is being human.
Perfectionism in recovery creates more anxiety.
We are not aiming for flawless skill execution.
We are aiming for forward movement.
What I Want You to Remember
- Mindfulness is your long-term strategy.
- Distraction can have a short-term place.
- Intensity and timing matter.
- Intention matters even more.
- You do not need to get this perfect.
Both tools can belong in your toolkit.
But mindfulness is what rewires your brain.
And if you practice it consistently, even imperfectly, you will see change.
If you want more structured support, we have courses at CBTSchool.com for OCD, generalized anxiety, depression, and more. They walk you step-by-step through building these skills in real life.
But wherever you are right now, start here:
When anxiety hits, pause.
Ask:
- How intense is this?
- How much time do I have?
- What would move me toward my values?
Then choose.
Not perfectly.
Just wisely enough.
And that is more than enough.
Transcription: Mindfulness vs. Distraction: Which is Better for Anxiety & Panic? (A Therapist Explains)
Now I’m wondering if this is familiar to you. You experience the onset of anxiety. You’ve heard all over social media, on YouTube. You’ve read books about mindfulness, you’ve heard about distraction techniques, and you’re left so confused, not knowing which one to use, but the problem with that. Is not only are you anxious, now you have even more anxiety and distress because you are confused about what is the quote unquote right thing to do.
So in this episode, my whole agenda is to help you to understand which is better for anxiety and panic. Is it mindfulness? Is it distraction? Let’s get to it. Hello, my name is Kimberly Quinlan. I am an anxiety specialist. I help people all around the world manage their anxiety gaps. Back to doing the thing that they love.
And I am on a mission to do just two things. Number one, I wanna reduce suffering, and I wanna increase the joy and the presence that you have in your life. So let’s talk about this kerfuffle conundrum problem that we have. When we experience anxiety, it is very important that you understand the anxieties.
Cycle, and this is true for any anxiety condition or any anxious experience that you have. You’ll first experience a trigger, something that triggers off your anxiety. It might be an internal trigger, might be an external trigger, and then you will feel anxiety. Now, what we tend to do when that happens is we going to fight flight, freeze, and fawn.
There are the different ways in which we respond and we engage in avoidance, rumination, we might do compulsions or safety behaviors. Our goal is to get rid of that anxiety. ASAP, right? We just want it gone. We want it sold. We want the uncertainty to go away, and we want life back to normal. So we engage in these avoidant compulsions or avoidant.
Behaviors. But what that does is it gets us some short-term relief, but it reinforces the fear and it reinforces this idea that you constantly need to get rid of anxiety, and it keeps you stuck in a long-term trap. Now, what we wanna move towards today is when you have a trigger and you have anxiety, then notice the urge to engage in avoidance or safety behaviors.
But we are not gonna do that. Right. We’re gonna learn how to stop doing that. All of the courses that we have@cbtschool.com are going to be teaching you how to intervene at this point. Um, so we’re gonna work at reducing that, and we’re going to, in that case, not get that short-term relief. But the cool thing is we won’t be reinforcing.
That long-term trap, but that leaves you to wonder, what do I do instead? I don’t wanna be uncomfortable for the rest of my life. Well, no, we are going to give you some skills today that you can use so that when that hit anxiety does hit, you know what to do, and you know whether you want to use mindfulness or distraction.
Now we’re gonna go through a bit of a pros and a cons list here today so that you can determine what’s best for you based on the specific. Example and situation you’re in. I’m gonna go through some very, very specific examples. Okay? So let’s talk about, first, this is for anybody with anxiety. This is not just for generalized anxiety.
This is gonna be helpful for folks with OCD health, anxiety, phobias, social anxiety, health anxiety. Any anxiety presentation will even talk about how to use these two different skills for depression. Um, and so I want you to just be thinking through whatever your specific situation is. How does this apply to me?
So here we go. Let’s get into it. Let’s first understand what is mindfulness. Let’s get really clear on what it is. So again, you can determine what’s best for you. Mindfulness involves observing your thoughts and your feelings and your sensations, and your urges and your images without judgment. So you’re gonna have no matter what thought you have, no matter what sensation you have, you are going to practice not judging it.
That’s key. It’s also gonna teach you how to practice allowing that sensation or that anxiety to, and you’re gonna be present with it without trying to get rid of it. Remember we talked about the cycle. Then in that cycle you are trying to get rid of it. But when we are using mindfulness, we’re not resisting it.
We’re actually accepting of the discomfort. Last of all, it’s a long-term strategy. Mindfulness is a long-term strategy and it helps you to rewire your response to fear. So the more you practice it, the more you train your brain not to go into that fight, flight, freeze, and fa and it teaches it a sense of mastery over the anxiety.
It doesn’t mean you’re not gonna have anxiety. It helps you to have a response and a habitual response so that you’re less triggered, you can stay more present, and you can stay more regulated. Now on the contrast, distraction can provide temporary relief and function as a helpful pause. I know a lot of folks on the internet are very against distraction, and I’m not saying here that I’m.
All for destruction, either. We’re going to have a very balanced approach here, but what we wanna know here is that the pros of destruction is it can provide temporary relief and help you get that pause so that you can move into mindfulness. Now when overused, yes. The con here is it can reinforce avoidance.
It can prevent long-term recovery. And last of all, it’s important to notice what. Is your intention behind the distraction? Is it a part of a larger recovery strategy or is it just an attempt to, again, like we were talking about before, to just remove anxiety and uncertainty as soon as possible. Okay. So before we move on, I want to get clear for you guys on the role of timing and intensity.
We already know that the benefits of mindfulness for. Far outweigh the benefits of distraction that is going to be key for you moving forward. And we know, as you have listened here on your anxiety toolkit, there are so many skills you can use in the moment of panic and complete high level of distress.
We have your mindfulness skills, your self-compassion skills, the anxiety, your anxiety toolkit is a built out toolkit to help you have the skills that you can use. So I wanna really get clear here that of course. Always we’re going to be trying to use our mindfulness, but there is a time and a place for distraction.
And I wanna go through with you this sort of goal or this sequence or strategy that might help you to determine when you may want to use it. So I want you to imagine a graph. And on this graph at the very top is high intensity anxiety, and the very bottom is low intensity anxiety. This is basically saying, are you at a zero outta 10 or a 10 outta 10?
Now, the cross, um, of this graph is, have you got lots of time or have you got no time at all? This will also help you to determine which skill you use. Now what I wanna really, really emphasize here is of course. We’re always going to goal for using your mindfulness skills first. They have so much benefit.
They are that long-term recovery tool. It’s staying present. It’s staying non-judgmental. It’s being willing to feel your feelings, but I wanna acknowledge to those folks, there are times when you aren’t willing and you don’t wanna feel anxiety. The anxiety is a 10 outta 10, and you can’t even come up with a tool.
You can’t bring to mind one tool from your tool belt. It’s completely gone out the window. And so in that case, let’s just bring in some nuance here. So let’s say you’re in a high intense situation, 10 outta 10 anxiety, and you’ve got tons of time. Preferably, you’re going to move into your mindfulness. Now, if you have no capacity to be mindful, yes, you can rely on some distraction, but I want you to think of this mindfulness distraction combo, and when I talk about distraction, I’m talking about like putting your attention on something.
The distraction is only there to help you regulate enough. So that you can come back to doing the mindful activity, and you might wanna slow it all down. Sometimes when we have anxiety, we speed up, you wanna slow it down so you have more access to your prefrontal cortex, the part of your brain that can think through those skills and come up with strategies and skills and ideas that are effective.
So we wanna slow down so that we can prioritize it. But if you need to use distraction, let’s say you’re full 10 out of 10, this is what we call a dialectical behavioral therapy skill. We might want to engage in some sort of distraction to help you get regulated so you can go back. To doing your exposure or doing that scary thing.
So again, I’m not here to completely say you’re naughty, naughty girl and boy for using distraction. There will be times when you’re at that high intensity where you may want to teeter into using it. If you’re unable to use your mindfulness now, we also have on that graph that when it’s high intensity, but you’ve got literally zero time in that moment, you’ve gotta get on the plane or get on the EL elevator or walk out and give that presentation.
You’ve got nothing. Nothing. You’ve got no time but to get out there and do that scary thing. Well, in that case, yes, I’m going to let you encourage you to use some distraction on that thing you’re doing and manage it with whatever skill you can. And you’re gonna do that in spurts, right? So you’re gonna do it, but you’re gonna try to bring in your mindfulness as best as you can.
Now, some people will say, well, isn’t. Distraction, mindfulness? Well, yeah, it can be, but I think the real difference is distraction is often done because you’ve got to like, push your anxiety away. You’ve gotta like, um, completely bring your attention to this thing. I always think about, like my um, husband, he’s been on the podcast, he’s talked about.
His, uh, flight anxiety in those moments when he’s boarding, he’s like, I’m not gonna, I haven’t got the capacity to be mindful. I just have to like stare at the back of that plane and I just need to get myself there. And it doesn’t matter what happens. I don’t care if I’m using signals or not. I’ve just gotta get myself on there.
And that’s okay. That’s the definition of a distraction. But again, we’re only gonna do that in very, very, very short spurts. We’re gonna use it very, very sparingly. But I don’t want to make you feel like distraction is a big, bad thing. Okay? Now the next option here is, let’s say you’ve got low intensity of anxiety, uh, but you’ve still got no time.
Well, I’m going to say if your anxiety is at a low level, 100%, I want you to be aiming for that mindfulness. Usually when anxiety is low, we have a much better connection with prefrontal cortex. We have a much better. Um, connection with the skills and we can access them better. We can regulate ourselves better, and in that case, absolutely focus on your mindfulness.
Use it as an opportunity to do those reps and mindfulness practice takes reps, guys, it’s not something you do 20 times and you’re like, great. I’m so good now. I don’t have anxiety and I’m completely free of any kind of avoidant distractions and any avoidant compulsions, and I’m just good. No, this is a practice that you practice over and over and over and over again.
Now, the next part of the graph, which is final part, which is it’s a very low intensity and you’ve got tons of time to practice. Of course, we want mindfulness. Again, this is an opportunity for you to practice this skill, but again, I’m here to take out the. Judgment. ’cause remember, being mindful is really about non-judgment.
Taking the judgment out of distraction. You are allowed to engage in things if it helps you with this intention of doing the scary thing. Now, if you’re saying, I’m gonna distract and if. It’s actually so that I never have to face my fear again, and I’m, that’s you walking directly away from your values.
That’s the opposite of what we’re going for. If you need to use distraction for the sake of fa facing a fear or doing something that aligns with your values, that is functional and helps you function better. In very short spurts. It’s okay. Don’t be hard on yourself and please don’t spend time going, which is which?
Which one should I use? Should I use this one? Should I use that one? No, we don’t want to do that. Okay, so that’s the role of intensity and time. Now, okay, let’s go back to looking at distraction. Consider it. Life vest, a vest that you wear for the most emergent situations when you’ve got nothing else. And it’s okay to use it if it helps you to get through that moment so that you can get back on the horse and get back to your mindfulness skills.
I want you just to think of it that way. All right, so now let’s really get a little deeper here. Let’s look at. Practicing mindfulness versus destruction for a few different situations or conditions. For folks with OCD, you, this is important to know if you’re someone who has repetitive, intrusive thoughts, uh, feelings, sensations, urges, um, they’re called obsessions, right?
So they’re very, very repetitive. You wanna be careful with destruction because sometimes destruction. Is a form of thought suppression and what we know with folks with OCD and a lot of other conditions we’ll talk about here as well, okay? When you have those intrusive thoughts, if you are trying to push them away, if you are trying to suppress them, you will actually end up having more of them.
You’re actually feeding a cycle of what you resist persists. So remember that. That we wanna be, again, used destruction as sparingly as possible. Because again, thought suppression, the act of trying not to think about something often will increase you thinking about it. ’cause think about it, if I’m trying not to think about an elephant, I’m going to think about an elephant in attempt to not think about an elephant, if that makes sense.
And with OCD, that is very, very important component of your recovering. Now with health anxiety, this is a case where I have heard some people say, oh, there’s times when I’m sitting in the doctor’s office, I am petrified. All I wanna do is run away. Um, and so, you know, I use quote unquote distraction. Maybe they do a crossword puzzle or they place some Tetris on their phone.
And so what happens there is they’re using quote unquote. Distraction to stay there so that they can get the thing that they need done. Now, again, is that distraction or are you just being mindful? I think that this is sort of like a. Like a, just a competition on words, like it doesn’t really matter.
Again, I think again, think of it through the lens of what is your intention while you’re there. It doesn’t matter whether we call it destruction or mindfulness. As long as you’re willingly having the discomfort, you’re allowing that discomfort to be there. You’re not judging it as good or bad, and you’re staying to fulfill the thing.
Keeps you healthy. Now, I’ve had clients who said, I’m about to go into surgery. I can’t be mindful. I’m just gonna practice destruction. I don’t even care again. It doesn’t matter if you’re, if it helps you to get into that surgery, you’ll get better with time and, and you can only, you’ve gotta sort of, you win some, you lose some ultimately.
But these are some examples of where people get really stuck. And I wanna really be clear here that intention matters, but at the end of the day, we wanna just be doing the thing that. Helps you move forward in your recovery. Let’s talk about panic disorder again, distraction is another one of those conditions you wanna use.
Distraction very, very. Rarely if possible. Now, when we talk about panic disorder, we are talking about 10 out of 10 anxiety. So if you go back to the graph, yes, in that situation, you may need to distract. That is okay, but we wanna again, interact between between. Distraction and going back to mindfulness as much as you can, mindfulness is always gonna get you better outcomes than if you use distraction.
The thing to remember about panic disorder is panic disorder is often the fear of panic. And so if you are trying to avoid. The panic, you’re probably reinforcing that fear, making your panic disorder even stronger. Now, for folks with generalized anxiety, again, if you’ve got a generalized anxiety, please prioritize your mindfulness as much as you can.
Things about money, finances, relationships, the more you can bring mindfulness into your day, the more regulated you would be. I’m a big believer on practicing mindfulness. Every day, even when you’re not anxious, so that you manage your generalized anxiety better. Okay. We don’t wanna mindlessly scroll internet just to try and avoid our generalized anxiety.
That’s not super helpful. Be as mindful and as kind as you can. Now with eating disorders, again, this is where it gets a little tricky. I remember when I had to do very big exposures from, for my eating disorder, I had to eat burritos, I had to eat fettuccine Alfredo, I had to eat cream. Things I was really anxious about, and I’m not gonna lie, there were times I did use a distraction while I was eating the fettuccine Alfredo.
I might have been looking at a video on my computer, or I might have watched a show and. Yes, ideally it would’ve been better if I was more mindful of my discomfort. But again, being mindful doesn’t mean you just focus on discomfort either, only because that sometimes can be a part of the problem as well.
You’re over focusing on it. So again, this is sort of the nuance here. I wanna bring a lot of nuance in there. And again, you decide as long as the behavior is moving you towards your long-term recovery, that’s all that matters. Now, the last one I wanted to talk about is depression. Depression. You know, guys know our depression can be a big, big liar.
It’s gonna tell you some horrible things mean things about you and your future and the world around you. And ideally, we’re going to be using mindfulness. However, if you’re in a big depressive episode, a lot of DBT therapists will encourage distraction there go and we actually call it. Occupation.
Occupation is where you put your attention on something away from your depression, because otherwise all you’re hearing is that you know, horrible lie that depression tells you. And that can get us into, you know, feeling even even worse. So there are some ways in which you may want to, to sort of like.
Seesaw back and forward or teeter-totter between these skills. Again, I keep stressing. We wanna, of course, prioritize mindfulness. Okay? So here are some things to remember. Both mindfulness and destruction can belong in your toolkit. Practicing mindfulness ahead of time can increase your capacity to choose wisely in that moment and be more regulated in that moment.
And if you can please do practice self-compassion when you’re choosing your approach because we are not. Here to aim for. Perfect. If you have searched this topic, if you’re someone who is here because you’ve looked this up and you’ve come across this episode, it’s a chance that you are, are pretty distressed about trying to sort of perfect your recovery.
Perfect. Getting it the right and making sure you’re doing the right thing. And that’s only gonna create more anxiety for you. So we’re not aiming for perfect here. I am a big believer in a B minus effort, right? We don’t need a pluses in recovery, real recovery. Usually is around a B minus, because that B minus helps manage the anxiety of having to be perfect.
Okay, so thank you so much. I hope that really helped you understand the difference between mindfulness and destruction. I hope that you continue to prioritize your mindfulness skills, but again, do not get. Into the nitty gritty. Again, it’s okay to have some, um, fluctuations in your recovery. We’re not expecting you to be perfect.
Okay? Head over to cbt school.com. If you want more resources, we have causes on generalized anxiety, OCD, depression, most of the conditions we have courses for. So go check your out. I’ll see you in the next episode of your anxiety toolkit.
