11 Things I Tell My Patients in Their First Session of OCD Treatment | Ep. 378

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is a challenging condition, but the good news is that it’s highly treatable. The key to effective management and recovery lies in understanding the condition, embracing the right treatment approaches, and adopting a supportive mindset. This article distills essential guidance and expert insights, aiming to empower those affected by OCD with knowledge and strategies for their treatment journey.

• YOU ARE BRAVE FOR STARTING OCD TREATMENT

Taking the first step towards seeking help for OCD is a significant and brave decision. Acknowledging the courage it takes to confront one’s fears and commit to treatment is crucial. Remember, showing up for therapy or seeking help is a commendable act of bravery.

• YOU CAN GET BETTER WITH OCD TREATMENT

OCD treatment, particularly through methods like Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), has shown considerable success. These evidence-based approaches are supported by extensive research, indicating significant potential for individuals to reclaim their lives from OCD’s grasp. The path may not lead to a complete eradication of symptoms, but substantial improvement and regained control over one’s life are highly achievable.

• OCD TREATMENT IS NOT TALK THERAPY

OCD therapy extends beyond the realms of conventional talk therapy, involving specific exercises, homework, and practical worksheets designed to confront and manage OCD symptoms directly. These tools are integral to the treatment process, allowing individuals to actively engage with their treatment both within and outside therapy sessions.

• THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS “BAD” THOUGHTS

A pivotal aspect of OCD treatment involves changing how individuals perceive their thoughts and their control over them. It’s essential to recognize that thoughts, regardless of their nature, do not define a person. Attempting to control or suppress thoughts often exacerbates them, which is why therapy focuses on techniques that allow individuals to accept their thoughts without judgment and reduce their impact.

• YOU CAN NOT CONTROL YOUR THOUGHTS, BUT YOU CAN CONTROL YOUR BEHAVIORS

You will have intrusive thoughts and feelings. This is a part of being human, and it is not in your control. However, you can learn to pivot and change your reactions to these intrusive thoughts, feelings, sensations, urges, and images. 

• YOU HAVE MANY OCD TREATMENT OPTIONS

While medication can be a valuable part of OCD treatment, particularly when combined with therapy, it’s not mandatory. Decisions regarding medication should be made based on personal circumstances, preferences, and professional advice, acknowledging that progress is still possible without it.

In addition to ERP and CBT, other therapies such as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), mindfulness, and self-compassion practices have emerged as beneficial complements to OCD treatment. These approaches can offer additional strategies to cope with symptoms and improve overall well-being.

The accessibility of OCD treatment has expanded significantly with the advent of online therapy and self-led courses. These digital resources provide valuable support, particularly for those unable to access traditional therapy, enabling individuals to engage with treatment tools and strategies remotely.

For those without access to a therapist, self-led OCD courses and resources can offer guidance and structure. Engaging with these materials can empower individuals to take active steps towards managing their OCD, underscoring the importance of self-directed learning in the recovery process.

• TREATMENT WILL NEVER INVOLVE YOU DOING THINGS YOU DO NOT WANT TO DO

I am usually very clear with my patients. Here are some key points I share

• • I will never ask you to do something I do not want you to do
  • I will never ask you to do something that I myself would not do 
  • I will never ask you to do something that goes against your values.

• RECOVERY IS NOT LINEAR

Recovery from OCD is not a linear process; it involves ups and downs, successes and setbacks. Embracing discomfort and challenges as part of the journey is essential. Adopting a mindset that views discomfort as an opportunity for growth can greatly enhance one’s resilience and progress in treatment.

There will be good days and hard days. This is normal for OCD recovery.  There will be days when you feel like you are making no progress, but you are. Keep going at it and be as gentle as you can

• SETTING CLEAR TREATMENT GOALS

Clarifying treatment goals is crucial for a focused and effective therapy experience. Whether it’s reducing compulsions, living according to one’s values, or tackling specific fears, clear goals provide direction and motivation throughout the treatment process.

• BE HONEST WITH YOUR THERAPIST

The success of OCD treatment is significantly influenced by the honesty and openness of the individual undergoing therapy. Without reservation, sharing one’s thoughts, fears, and experiences allows for more tailored and effective therapeutic interventions.

• IT IS A BEAUTIFUL DAY TO DO HARD THINGS. 

No question. You can do hard things! 

OCD is a complex but treatable condition. By understanding the essentials of effective treatment, including the importance of evidence-based therapies, the role of mindset, and the value of self-directed learning, individuals can embark on a journey towards recovery with confidence. Remember, every step taken towards confronting OCD is a step towards reclaiming control over one’s life and living according to one’s values and aspirations.

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TRANSCRIPT

There is so much bad advice out there about OCD treatment. So today, I wanted to share with you the 11 things I specifically tell my patients on their first day of OCD therapy. 

Hello, my name is Kimberley Quinlan. I’m an OCD specialist. I specialize in cognitive behavioral therapy, and I have helped hundreds of people with OCD over the course of the 10, 15 years I have been in practice. 

Now, whether you have an OCD therapist or not, my goal is to help you feel confident and feel prepared when addressing your OCD treatment and symptoms, whether you have an OCD therapist or not. That is the big goal here at CBTSchool.com and Your Anxiety Toolkit podcast. 

Make sure you stick around until the end because I will also be sharing specific things that you can remember if you don’t have a therapist, because I know a lot of you don’t. And I’ll be sharing what you need to know so that you don’t feel like you’re doing it alone. 

Now, if you’re watching this here on YouTube, or you follow me on social media at Your Anxiety Toolkit, let me know if there’s anything I’ve missed or anything that you were told on your first session that was particularly helpful, because I’m sure your knowledge can help someone else or another person with OCD who is in need of support and care and advice. So let’s go.

Here are the 11 things that I tell my patients on their first day of OCD therapy. Number one, I congratulate them for showing up, because showing up for OCD treatment is probably one of the most brave things you can do. I really make sure I validate them that this is scary, and I’m really glad they’re here. And I’m pretty impressed with the fact that they showed up, even though it’s scary. 

The second thing I tell them is that OCD treatment is successful. You can come a long way and make massive changes in your life by going through the steps of OCD treatment, showing up, being willing to take a look at what’s going on in your life, and making appropriate changes so that you can get your life back, do things you want to do, spend more time with your family, your friends, the things you love to do, like hobbies, and that OCD treatment can be very effective. We’re very lucky that OCD is a very treatable condition. It doesn’t mean it’ll go away completely, but you can have absolute success in getting your life back. 

Now, one thing to know here is, how do we know this? Well, OCD treatment research and OCD treatment articles. If you go onto Google Scholar, you will find a lot of articles that show a meta-analysis of the OCD treatments available, where it shows that ERP and cognitive behavioral therapy are the gold standard of treatment. And using a meta-analysis, that basically means that they’ve surveyed all of the large, well-done research articles and found which one shows the most results and shows that they have the most repeated results over periods of time. And that’s why it is so important that you do follow the research because there is a lot of bad information out there, absolutely. 

Now, the third thing I tell my patients on their first day of therapy is that OCD treatment is not talk therapy. It’s not just talking, that it requires OCD therapy exercises and homework and lots of worksheets. I have a packet that we give our patients at the center that I own in Calabasas, California. Everyone gets a welcome manual. And in the welcome manual, it’s got worksheets on identifying obsessions and compulsions. It’s got mindfulness worksheets. It’s got logging worksheets. And I will send you home with those to do for homework. You’ll come back. Let me know what worked, what didn’t work, what was helpful, what wasn’t. And you will be doing a lot of this work on your own. 

Now, again, as I mentioned at the beginning, if you do not have access to OCD therapy or you don’t have the resources to get that, we have an online course called ERP School. It is a course specifically for people with OCD, where I walk you through the specific steps that I take my patients through. And all of those worksheets are there. They have worksheets on identifying your obsessions, identifying your compulsions, mindfulness, self-compassion worksheets, things that can remind you and prompt you in the direction of setting up a plan so that you can get moving and make the steps on your own.

The fourth thing that you need to know on the first day of your therapy is that there is no such thing as bad thoughts. Let’s just sit with that for a second. There is no such thing as bad thoughts. Your thoughts do not define you, nor do your behaviors, that you might have these thoughts that you think are going to really freak you out. You might have this idea, these thoughts, these intrusive, repetitive, scary thoughts, and you might think, “Well, I can’t even tell Kimberley about them yet.”

I will often tell my patients like there is nothing these walls haven’t heard, and you probably won’t shock me because I haven’t been shocked in many, many, many years working as an OCD therapist. I’ve heard it all. I’ve heard the most, what people perceive as the grossest thoughts. It’s a normal part of the work that we do. And your thoughts are neither good nor bad and they do not define you. And I really make that point made because, as we move forward, I want you to know that I’ve seen a lot of cases and that “your thoughts aren’t special” in that they’re not something that I would be alarmed by. 

The fifth thing that I would tell my patients is that you cannot control your thoughts. And I bet you believe it because you’ve probably tried over and over again, and all you found is the more you try and control it, the more thoughts you have. The more you try to suppress your thoughts, the more thoughts you have.

There are, as we’ve already discussed, OCD treatment options that will really solidify this concept. Now, the most important one is exposure and response prevention, which is the type of treatment that we use for OCD and is the type of treatment that all of those research articles I discussed before show and direct to as a really successful treatment for OCD. 

Now, in addition, there are other OCD treatment options. One of those treatment options is OCD treatment with medication. Now, again, when you do that meta-analysis, we have found that a combination of CBT and ERP with medication is the most successful. Now, that doesn’t mean you have to take medication, though. I’m never going to tell my patients that they have to take medication. 

So we can have OCD treatment with medication. We can have OCD treatment without medication. In fact, some of my most difficult cases, the clients, for medical reasons or for personal values reasons, chose not to go on medication. You can still get better. It might make it a little more difficult. You may want to speak with your therapist, or if you’re doing this alone, you might need to put in a little extra homework, have a team of support, and people who are really there holding you accountable. Absolutely. But medication is another treatment option that you may want to consider as you move through this process.

Now there are also new treatments for OCD recovery. They might include acceptance and commitment therapy, mindfulness practices, self-compassion. We even have some research around dialectical behavioral therapy as other OCD treatment interventions. I will be implementing those as we go, depending on what roadblocks show up. And again, if you’re doing this on your own, there are amazing resources that can also help you, and I’ll share about those here in a bit.

Again, as we’ve talked about, there is also OCD treatment online. Since COVID-19, we’ve done a lot of growing in terms of being able to utilize CBT via the internet, via our computers, via our smartphones. A lot of people come to us because they’ve looked for OCD treatment in Los Angeles, which is where we are. And even though they only live a few miles down the street, they’re still doing sessions online because it’s so convenient. They can do it at home between sessions with their work or between getting their kids to school. So, OCD treatment online has become a very popular way to also access treatment. And I give these to my clients as we go, because sometimes they’re going to need a little extra help. 

Now, as I’ve mentioned to you earlier in there, if you don’t have access to OCD treatment, there are tons of self-led OCD courses. Again, one of the ones that we offer is ERP School. Now you can go to CBTSchool.com, or you can click the link below in the show notes, where we have all of these courses for OCD and other anxiety disorders. But there are others as well—other amazing therapists who have created similar products. 

When we’re really looking at treatment depending on your age, the treatment does look very similar for OCD treatment for adults and OCD treatment for children. They are very, very similar. With children, we might play more games, have more rewards, use those strategies, but to be honest with you, adults are just big kids in adult bodies. So I really believe that we want to make this as fun as we can. Have rewards. Have there be something that you’re working towards. Make it fun. Make it a part of a game. I use a lot of games in treatment and a lot of ERP games because why do we want to make everything boring all the time? Why not make it a little bit fun if we can?

Number seven, the main thing I’m going to tell you here, and this is really, really important, is I will not ask you to do something that you don’t want to do. I have this in our welcome manual. We don’t ask people to do things that go against their values, and we don’t ask people to do things that I myself would not do. There are a lot of TV shows that sort of use ERP and exposure work as sort of like doing your worst, worst, worst, worst, worst case. And that’s fine. But often we’re not doing that. We’re doing exposures, we’re facing your fears so that you can get back to functioning, so you can get back to doing the things you want to do.

So again, I’m not going to have you do anything you don’t want to do. You’re in charge. If you’re taking ERP School, we do the same thing. You create your own plan. You create a hierarchy of what you want to start with, and we work our way up. And we do the same thing in therapy as well. 

Now the eighth thing that I will tell you, and by then you’re probably getting a little tired and overwhelmed. We might take a little tea break really quick, but I would tell you that recovery is not linear. While we do have effective treatment for OCD, it will be an up-and-down process. You’ll have really good days, and you’ll have some hard days. And those hard days don’t mean that you’re doing anything wrong. It doesn’t mean that your treatment’s not successful. It just means we have to take a look here and see what’s going well, what’s not going well, what do we need to tweak, do we need to make a pivot here. Or do we need to reassess something and maybe apply some additional tools—mindfulness tools again, self-compassion skills, some distress tolerance skills, maybe? But just remember, your recovery will not be linear, and that is okay. 

Now the ninth thing I’m going to tell you is that your OCD treatment goals must be clear. You are going to get really clear on why you’re here, what you want to do, why you’re doing this treatment because it is hard work. Again, there’s homework. I’m going to be giving you some things to do at home, and they’re going to be a little bit difficult. They’re going to cause you to feel some feelings that maybe you don’t want to feel, some sensations you don’t want to feel. 

And so, really again, I will ask them, like, what are your goals for treatment? Now, some common OCD goals for OCD therapy is to reduce compulsions. “I want to be able to not be doing these compulsions for hours and hours.” Other people say, “I want to live my life according to my values. I don’t want to let fear constantly be telling me what to do.” Other people will say, “I want to learn how to tolerate this discomfort and this uncertainty because every time I try and run away from it, it just gets worse. It makes it worse. And now I’m stuck in this cycle.” So it’s important that you get really clear. 

Sometimes people will come in and they’ll say, “I’ve never been to Paris. I want to be able to go to Paris with my family. And so, that’s the goal.” That’s fine too. You could have a large goal like that, or you could have a really simple goal like, “I just want to have more space in my life to paint,” or “I don’t want to feel like I’m on edge all the time, like the scariest thing is going to happen all the time.” And that’s fine too. 

Now, the 10th thing that you’re going to need to know and need to remember is, our recovery is really dependent on how open and honest you are. As I said at the beginning, some people don’t feel yet like they can trust to tell me the depth of their intrusive thoughts, and that’s okay. But throughout therapy, I’m going to need you to be really honest with me and really honest with yourself, because if you’re not disclosing what’s going on and the thoughts you’re having, we can’t actually apply the skills to it. And then it puts a wrench in the success of your treatment. 

So we want you to be as open, honest as you can. And I often will say to them, there is nothing I haven’t heard. In fact, if you have taken ERP School already—a lot of you have—we actually play a couple of games where we play a game called One Up, which is where no matter what thought you have, you make it a little worse or little more scary. And I give some demonstrations and show like I’m not afraid to go there. I will go to the scary, yucky place just to show you that that’s what I want you to do as well. Again, it doesn’t have to be all serious. We’re allowed to play games, and we do that in therapy as well. 

Often people will ask like, how do I tell my therapist about these horrible thoughts I’m having? Like, how do I share? If you’re having a specific type of thought that you feel is particularly taboo or very scary to share, or you’re afraid of the consequences of sharing, what I would encourage you to do is do a very quick Google search. There are some amazing websites and articles online of your obsession. Print it out and bring it to your therapist, and say, “Hey, this is what I’m dealing with. I’m too scared or I’m too vulnerable to share. It’s so horrendous in my mind, but this is what I’m going through.” And chances are, again, the therapist, if they’re a trained OCD specialist, will go, “Ah, thank you for letting me know. I’ve treated that before. I’m good to go.” Again, if they’re a newer therapist, it’s still okay because they’re getting the education about really common obsessions that happen a lot in our practice. 

Okay. Here we go—drum roll to the last one. And I know you guys are probably already guessing what it is. It’s something I say to my patients and to you guys all the time, and it’s this: It’s a beautiful day to do hard things. 

We have been taught that life should be easy, shouldn’t be scary, shouldn’t be hard, and that you should be Instagram-ready all the time. But the truth is, life is hard. And today is a beautiful day to do those hard things. I have found that those who recover the fastest and the most successful over time are the ones who see discomfort as a challenge, something that they’re willing to have. They’ll say, “Bring it on, let’s go. Bring my shoulders back. I know it’s going to be here.” And they’re really gentle with themselves when they have this discomfort. And I want you to really walk away feeling empowered that you too can handle some pretty uncomfortable things because you already are. So again, it’s a beautiful day to do hard things. 

All right, let’s round it out because I know I promised you some extra things here. Now, what have we covered? We’ve covered the mindset shifts that you need for OCD therapy, behavioral changes that you’re going to need to make. We’ve talked about complementary tools, the most important being self-compassion. And also, guys, you can also follow Your Anxiety Toolkit because we have over 380 episodes of tools and core concepts, and everything like that. 

Now, for treatment, just so that you get an idea of what this would look like, I share with my patients what treatment looks like. So usually, once I’ve told them all of this, I send them home with their welcome manual, and I’ll say, “The next two to three sessions, I’m going to be training you for this treatment. And a lot of that is going to involve psychoeducation, me giving you tools, giving you strategies, putting a plan together.” And again, for those of you who don’t have therapy, we do exactly that in ERP School. So if you feel like you need some structure, you can go to CBTSchool.com and access ERP School. We can go through that. 

Now, for those of you, again, who don’t have an OCD therapist, does OCD therapy and treatment work for you too? Yes. We actually have some early research to show that self-led programs can be very successful for people with OCD and with other anxiety disorders. So, if you don’t have access to therapy, you could take ERP School. You could buy some workbooks that you buy from Amazon or your local bookstore. There are a ton of workbooks out there. Shameless plug, I also wrote one called The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD. You can get it wherever you buy books. There are also online groups. I’m a huge, huge proponent of online groups. So if there are support groups in your area, by all means, use those because just knowing other people who are struggling, what you’re struggling with can be so validating and inspiring because you’re seeing them do the hard thing as well. 

But either way, treatment requires a lot of homework. So, as I say to patients, showing up here once a week isn’t going to get you better. You’re going to have to practice the skills. And if you don’t have a therapist, you’re going to be doing that anyway. So I want to really hope that you leave here with a sense of inspiration and hope that you can get better even if you don’t have OCD therapy at this time.

So there you go, guys. There are the 11 things I tell my patients on the very first session. I will usually end the session by encouraging them and, again, congratulating them for coming in and doing this work with me. Let them know I’m so excited for them. 

I hope that this was helpful for you, and my hope is that you too will then go on to learn all the tools that you need in your tool belt and go on to live the life that you want to live because that’s the whole mission here at Your Anxiety Toolkit. 

Have a wonderful day, everybody, and I’ll talk to you next week.